Oh Saturn... You! As Saturn goes direct on September 18th, 2019, we will find this forward moving motion reoccurring in our lives! If you've felt slowed down or a loss of momentum, it's completely normal! Saturn also has a lot of relation to our Karma, and undoing the deeds of our past. You might find old patterns returning in order to balance the scales. You might find that your old life is coming back to "haunt" you. In fact, it isn't. It's a part of the process of balance, and being able to correct our behaviors in life. It's a reflection back to us regarding some underlying theme that is getting in the way or blocking our desires in life. When we've been operating on autopilot for so long, we forget the ways we might still be running on this default setting. The process of awakening, in my perspective, is just an awareness of the daily inner operations and correcting them for the better. That's the internal process. There is so much more to awakening, such as growing with spirit and people. To rid judgement, remove separation, and to unify all aspects of our being. When there are no gaps in our field, we leave little room for anything to enter an unknown door. These gaps illuminate and aspect where something can come in and leech off of our field. This is why it's necessary to balance the scales of karma in our life. Whether it be from this lifetime or past lifetimes, we knew walking into this that we would be facing some baggage that we needed to clear. If this resonates with you, it's probably because this is your last incarnation here on Earth. We were offered the opportunity to serve in this Ascension, and to be there for others so we could ascend after this life. Many of us had Eons of control and war we fought in, and wanted to come in to pay off those debts once and for all. I have found that with Saturn going direct, I'm remembering more of my past lives and current incarnation, and it's haunting me. But, it doesn't have to. As long as I make peace and balance the scales, I will be okay. So, today, I consciously choose to look at my patterns and to remove anything that is blocking me from my highest ideals. Every morning, I call in all my lost aspects and align with my highest timeline. I choose to remove that which doesn't serve me in order to embody New Earth within. I ask that my guides assist me in the growth and expansion of my being and to assist in helping me to find the strength to express my truth. I ask that Saturn, my old friend, shows me what needs to be fixed, in order to continue the forward momentum toward expansion and serving my purpose here on Earth.
Who knew certain low frequency emotions would be so difficult to navigate in the human experience? I mean its simple right? Feel it, process it, and let it go… But there is one emotion that seems to be the most difficult to conquer of them all. That is, ANGER. As of recent, we have seen how this secondary emotion is repressed and not properly released. We see it in the news every single day, violent outbursts, shootings, and mass homicides. We see societal uprising at an all time high, as anger toward the political and societal structures is causing these controls to break down. Illumination of fundamental issues within the governing bodies is causing an upheaval in the collective, and the way we let out this anger is perpetuating a cycle of war and famine.
Now, into our personal lives, this still applies. How does one properly deal with anger? A majority of the population, especially the masculine collective, doesn’t know how to properly vent this lower, denser emotion. Yet, it’s an integral part of the human experience. We need to fully feel these lower states in order to achieve and appreciate the higher moments of our lives. The only way to flip the script and transmute this experience is through proper release of these energies. Let me ask this question again: how does one properly deal with anger? It varies for each individual, as we all handle and process emotion completely differently.
When we are raised in a home where this emotion ceases to be shown, many of us repress it and don’t ever let it come to the surface. On the flip side, if we see this emotion being processed in an unhealthy manner, we can take on this behavior and carry it on through the rest of our lives. I see this so much, both ends of the spectrum. I, personally, still am figuring out how to properly process my anger. Since I am an alchemist and love transmuting energy, I, today, choose to use it as fuel to drive my goals and passions. But, when it is unprocessed, we can give off that frequency and watch more discordant angry outbursts occur in our lives. Now, how about the collective?
Our personal realities are constantly coinciding with the collective reality as well. Even though we may be at peace and sniffing roses every day, we can still see the collective uprising. This is why it’s important to process this emotion, or any emotion, in a healthy way. Because this frequency is being transmitted into your quantum field, it’s also being transmitted into the collective field as well. Thus, the more people we have that are properly processing this, the more ease we will see in the collective. Preventative measures are not a hot theme in society today. We’re more prone to intervene in a crisis situation. Unfortunately, it’s not until the kettle is steaming hot that we see a solutions toward cooling the boiling pot.
So what preventative measures can we take toward easing the anger? Meditation has been the most leading tool for me. I have learned to tie back into the breath and to release through a Dragon’s Breath. Breathe in light, exhale the density. Physical exercise has also helped when the cup is getting way too full for my own good. A healthy release of endorphins through physical movement has caused the greatest of relief in times of unforgiving discord. A few other insights I received, was, to throw rocks at a river, or even to punch a pillow. Better a down pillow than another sovereign being trying to trek their way through the journey of life. I highly recommend you research Healthy Ways to Process Anger and find what works for you.
Recently, I have noticed a lot of anger and judgment with individuals in my reality. We forget that with the expulsion of fear programs and the way these energies are causing us to release, that some fundamental emotions get left in the dust. Nowhere in my spiritual handbook does it tell me how to be a healthy emotional being. You guys got the handbook, right? Was I the only one? Okay, I didn’t get a handbook. I did receive a few scars though! They make me beautiful! I digress... Self talk is a mofo at times…
Okay, so I see a lot of people dealing with unresolved anger. I feel it within them when I step close enough into their field. Even at a distance, I send a text message and can immediately feel this sensation of “STAY AWAY”, right when I click send. Its okay, I have learned not to judge people that are feeling their very real emotions. But, this energy can affect other people in our lives, and can be cast onto innocent loved ones. Since this emotion is unresolved and unprocessed, we tend to carry it into the most unassuming victim is just within reach. It’ll usually take a very small, unimportant event to be the catalyst toward the spill of this emotion. That’s when we cast the poison held within onto another individual, and thus keep the cycle of anger and aggression alive and healthy. When we don’t properly process any emotion and project it, we can end up spitting our own toxins on another, thus having them carry our own toxicity. Is that fair?
No, it isn’t. But it’s the way of the unconscious world. It’s a reality we face every single day. This is where that terms “don’t bite the hand that feeds you” stems from, for me. So we have to deal with this poison at once before our loved ones get the brunt of an unresolved issue that we carry from WHENEVER it chose to enter our field. If unprocessed, we will continually see it played out into our reality until we properly release it. Our poison darts of fear and anguish don’t belong in another person’s field, PERIOD. Even if these arrows came from someone else, it’s our duty as human beings to end the cycle of pain. This is why healthy coping mechanisms are essential toward the thriving state of our society. This is how we discover true freedom. We learn that these arrows of resentment and pain are in constant flow in this universe, and we can transmute them. We can end the suffering cycles through honoring that it’s still here, extremely present in every individual we meet. This emotion won’t be cast out any time soon, so we have to learn to deal with it. Today, I consciously choose to be mindful of my lower and denser emotions, to transmute them accordingly in the healthiest way possible, and to help the generations to come by practicing preventative measures. I choose to tip the scales with love and to be a being of hope that wants to end suffering for this generation and many generations to come. And so it is, and always will be…just as long as we continually practice new ways to process our darkness.
On 8/8/2019, also known as the Lion's Gate Portal, I was offered the opportunity to do some gridwork with a friend along the 33rd parallel from California out to Texas. Little did I understand the magnitude of this trip and how it would effect my awakening, and better innerstand what it means to do gridwork...
There's a lot of infamous history with the 33rd parallel as it stretches past the United States. Some famous events along the 33rd parallel include the JFK assassination, the creation of the Nuclear Bomb, the first drops of the atomic bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and Jesus foreseeing his death. When I first said okay to doing this gridwork, I thought it would be a great opportunity to see some beautiful sites and anchor some codes. Once I did further research on the magnitude of what has occurred along this line, I knew there was something more for me to do here. With my background and intuitive knowing, I realized that I had to clear some major aspects along this journey.
I am choosing not to share every detail of this journey with the public, as some parts are very "strange", with others extremely magical and monumental in the growth and perspective I hold within. This time, as I wanted to document every moment of the journey, was extremely personal and was needed for me and my travelling buddies eye's only. Gridwork of this magnitude is no small feat, and shouldn't be taken lightly. The extreme body transformation was the most difficult to deal with. I realized that my body needed to be in an alkaline state in order to anchor in the codes fully and for the level of clearing I was going to be doing. Did I listen? NOPE. This lead to a very grumpy Cory for a majority of the trip, as my body had little time to process everything going on, and thus reacted accordingly to the incoming changes.
I recommend if you ever do this kind of work, to do a fully body detox in order to prepare for the anchoring and clearing. When we are anchoring 12D codes into this reality, it can be a trying toll physically and emotionally. The pull between each realm to bring these codes down and to fully ground into the Crystalline core of Gaia can cause the body to release heavy programming. As we are anchoring these codes into Gaia, we are also downloading our own codes for our templates to reset and adjust to the new energies that have been arriving recently, as of 2019. These codes are in prep for 2020 shift and more people awakening to the 5th Dimensional consciousness here on Earth.
The most difficult part of this journey, for me, was channeling the sites and tuning into the energies of Gaia and the collective energies at these sites. The 2 biggest learning lessons were: "Let It Be", and "Roll With The Resistance". There were numerous places where I knew there was nothing I could do to save this place, other than to complete my part and to walk away. That was extremely difficult part to do and taught me to surrender to the fact that I, alone, can't save the world. That I can do my part and hope that the people and generations to come can uphold their mission in order to complete these cycles and to release the old paradigm. Having to see how man has raped and pillaged the land was really hard to succumb to. I had no other choice but to forgive my ancestors and the Divine Masculine's that have come before me. I knew that at this point, I could make peace for what man has done and consciously choose every day how I operated in order to better serve Mother Gaia and the generations of children to come.
I had many moments where I didn't know I was channeling the sites, and was wondering what the f*ck was going on with me. I quickly learned what it meant to channel, and how to pull it back into "me". Not only did I feel this, but my partner Samantha could tell as well. A lot of the trip, I wasn't here. I was in another world as I dd my work in other realms, and my physical form served as a channel to innerstand what was really going on. I am still working on pulling myself fully into body and to be present in this moment. This was my first taste of what is to come for me in my future.
These kinds of trips are not for the weak souls. It is meant for those that really want to buckle down and make a change. Collapsing timelines, closing portals, resetting energies, and anchoring codes at these sites is a huge task. It takes a lot out of you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It has helped to shape me into a new person, and to really grasp the magnitude of what man has done to this world. There is so much beauty in this world, and an equal amount of atrocities that have happened to our land. Understanding all of this and honoring it for what it is has shaped me into a new human that is now afforded the opportunity to truly forgive myself and others for the collective role we play in the global game of existence.
Once we embody forgiveness, we are now given the chance to love unconditionally. Through this love, we find self love, and give others the opportunity to be raw and vulnerable. I honor your scars, because I hold scars myself. That's the beauty of this mosaic that is the human. We have done right, we have done wrong. We have laughed, and we have cried. We have brought light, and we have lived in the darkness. Our frequencies have evolved and changed over time, thus shaping us into the beings that we are today. Honoring every part of this has led to a new found peace in the dark and in the light. This has brought a unified consciousness that has helped me see into the Sun and the Stars. It has anchored in an awareness of all that is, bringing about a profound insight that has changed my scope of reality and the human role in all of this. Will I do gridwork again? For sure. Will I be better prepared? Hopefully! The greatest part of all this is learning. The trial and error of the game of life. We live, we learn, we grow, we integrate. A cycle of completion that is needed in the evolution of man.
New potentialities are constantly available to us. With the way the energies are working now, we have doors of possibility that are always open for us to walk through, we just have to consciously choose to walk through them. A simple act of faith in alignment with guided action and heart centered focus can change your life in a split second. A simple "yes", can completely rewrite your story, move you into a healthier environment, and help you to build a world for yourself that you don't want to escape.
I recently faced this when I came back home from a vacation visiting my beautiful girlfriend in Texas. When I went out there, I felt all my problems and past traumas stay here at home. It's liked I walked out of my "little slice of hell" into my "little slice of heaven". When I came back home, I noticed the contrast between the two realities. I noticed a split of where I could end up, and where I currently am. It left me in a state of panic. "How did I create this?", "How am I still existing here?". Well, I didn't create all of this, as the collective conscience has a huge effect on the hologram I live in. But, I knew right then I needed to hop into my "heavenly" timeline and get the heck out of dodge!
I prayed day and night about answers of what to do. That's when the new potentiality came in. My Soul Mom and I were talking about her recent vacation with the grid work she's doing across the United States, when we started running through different visualizations as to how I could get to Texas safely and quickly. As soon as I stated my visualization out loud, the Universe conspired to make this change happen. Little did I know how supported this decision would be.
The magic behind this whole story will be documented officially, and I will have to release those stories to truly understand how beautiful this moment is. The trip hasn't started yet, as I leave in a week to move to my new home in Texas. But, the stories that come from this entire experience will help you to fully understand the magic that is available to us all. We just have to seek it and believe in it. The magic of all that is lies within us all is constantly calling us home. Home is a feeling within that we find when we fully learn to love ourselves unconditionally. It's a state of being that we anchor into this reality in order to find the reflection of that love in the world. Once we hone in on that self-love, we see the interconnectedness of this Universe and truly get why we are all here. Why we are all seeking this "home", especially the Starseeds that have chosen to incarnate right now in this timeline.
I am truly grateful for this new timeline to emerge for me. I am truly grateful to my Soul Mom, my Soul Tribe, my wonderful girlfriend, and everyone that is injecting love and positive energy into this transition. It goes to show how important the power of thought and energy is in manifestation, and how many people are supporting us in helping us walk through to the other side. Thank you to all who have held this bridge open. I can't wait to emerge in my slice of heaven to let you know how it all goes. Until then...
Creation, the point that fortunes us the opportunity to begin again. As we start to access already existing potentialities, and collapse them into a single point of focus, we recognize how our expansive energy can be a potent fuel toward creating our new reality. The issue that arises is, how do I water all of these seeds and leave time for myself, my loved ones, and strengthening my connection with my guidance? The process of creation is actually a great way to connect to the worlds we don't see, but perceive.
When it comes down to potentiality, in my belief, there are many "versions" of us that exist in this Universe. As we expand our energy upward and outward, we are sending out our frequency to call in every aspect of our being. Think of a radio signal being cast out into the Universe, and an antenna picking up this signal light years away, and sending a signal back. As we expand our energy, we could pick up on a neighboring frequency that is an already existing timeline in another time or galaxy. Yes, I know this is getting a little "woo-woo", but the theory of Quantum Entanglement is proving that this is actually very factual. If we are to take this principle and apply it to energy, it shows how us interacting with other energies can create a collapse that will irreversibly change the dynamics of your energy. This is the process of soul retrieval, finding the lost parts of us that have always existed.
So this process of Quantum Entanglement, when applied to the empath, can result in a process of identity loss. It's the idea that we are made up of not only our own frequency, but neighboring frequencies that can effect our energetic structure. We quickly realize we aren't "ourselves". I am you, you are me, I am my dog, I am my boss, I am even the trees and the stars. My frequency is made up of so many other frequencies that don't even belong to me. The difficult matter in all this is discerning who's is what. This is where meditation and clearing becomes a key component toward recognizing "who" we are. The deeper I go into retrieval and clearing my field, the more I recognize what I am. When entangled with what my roommate is, what my lover is, what my family is, it becomes a jumbled mess. There is hope, however! The more I clear and find my natural frequency, the more I can highlight these natural existing structures in order to mark them as "mine". Then, when a thought form or emotion comes to the surface, I can quickly discern what is mine and what isn't.
When I started to expand my field beyond this world and deep into the cosmos, I started to call home lost aspects that I didn't know existed. It has been quite a journey in rediscovery, but also extremely tiring when it comes down mutli-dimensionality and fitting all those parts into a 3D model that still has to suit up and show up. These archetypes have helped to reshape me into the "true" me that exists beyond this realm, but has also created difficulty in finding enough time to incorporate all these aspects into the "who". But this level of expansion isn't made to be easy. The thing I am currently trying to do is integrate all these pieces evenly into the "I Am" presence, and to create from this multi-faceted vantage point. The healer, the writer, the artist, the musician, the lover, the ruler, the magician, the helper. How does one create from all these vantage points? SLOWLY! I quickly recognized that my "path" when it comes to service and career wasn't meant to be easy. I'm not following someone else's design. I'm building my own blueprints, and this level of building can be shaky! There's no "one size fits all" solution in creating from these integrated aspects. That's where trial and error is key. It's a lot like building your own recipe, swapping out the parts until the taste is just right. Add a little of this, a little less of that. It's even more difficult doing all this and trying to maintain stable relationships and a job.
The beautiful thing is staying expanded through all of this and remaining firm in knowing that the path is becoming clearer and clearer. It's recognizing that some of us are meant to do something completely new, from our design, and it's definitely needed in the stagnancy of what is around in certain areas. It's creating a new perspective and new opportunity for others to follow suit in their own ventures. This time has called for us to build out a new way. We're building our recipes, and no longer copying the recipes of those that came before us. Even though this has been a challenge to fully develop, it's definitely a worth while process. To break the mold and to create from a level of love and innerstanding is what keeps me breathing. To know that one day, someone will face this same dilemma, and I just might have a solution for them to create from this same vantage point...that is beautiful. Even if it's only one person, I know that I did something right. So today, I consciously choose to create from this vantage point in hopes that what sticks, will stick. That what works, will work. And what happens, will happen, regardless of circumstance. So mote it be...and always will be.
William Shakespeare wrote, “All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players...”. This line always shook me to the core. The idea that this entire world is a gigantic divine orchestration, a beautiful sonnet stitched into the fabric of time, is truly an astonishing perspective. When we step out of the depth of the discord and turmoil, we choose to leave the first person perspective and become an observer of time. We play the part, but by consciously choosing to observe with non-attachment, we release fear and the need to feel the weight of what is around us. By being the observer, we can now find a new level of sovereignty and freedom. When this realization takes place, that is the exact moment that the hammer breaks the chains. The illusion is no longer a deciding factor of our reality. We can now escape the dream by joining the dream in harmonious union. We can recognize it for what it is, and choose to play with our reality. This is when we merge with our higher aspects and truly begin the journey. A lot of this path has been recognizing the dream, and then slowly breaking the patterns of belief associated with the dream. This was a heavy concept a first. The idea that this is all an illusion really brought about a level of deep emotional scarring. This is when the truth hit. How can this be an illusion when it feels so real? I think our concept of illusion has been skewed over time. When I think of the word "illusion", I think of a fake magical act. I think of slight of hand, trickery, and deceit. I think of being lied to. But that, once again, is a limited belief that has been stowed upon me by my experience of life. So, I choose to look at it as this, IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS. THE ILLUSION IS THAT LIFE DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS HARD. It's our programming and beliefs that create this discord within us. Our world is set up to keep us in a state of fight or flight. That's how you can easily implant a belief and instill control onto someone, through keeping them in the survival mode. That's when the animalistic tendencies set in, and we have no choice but to shut off our intuitive abilities. We are kept in thought and away from the heart. So, it's a time to bridge the gap between these two realities.
As I am typing up this blog post, my roommate comes into the room, getting extremely upset that he can't find a tool of his. His incessant suffering was induced by the difficulty of his experience. His patterns of belief made it so the outcome would be long, trudging his way to find this one tool he needed. As soon as I asked him what's up and he released this belief by expressing his frustration, he opens up one tool box and the tool is sitting RIGHT THERE. It wasn't that hard, but his mind had predetermined the outcome. He had a conscious decision right then and there, to just give up on finding the tool and resign to the miserable suffering of life. To never try again as the fated existence he knew would just lead to a tragic end. But, his persistence paid off.
Now, I know this is just a tool, but it's so much more than that. It's the recognition that this illusion doesn't have to be difficult. It's all about our attitude and perspective. I struggle with this EVERY SINGLE DAY. I wake up going, "Damnit, I'm still here." I make it a pact with myself every morning to suffer. Do I want to? No... It's engrained in my belief system. As soon as I smile and laugh a little bit, I notice the day get easier. I notice my mood shift, and so does my reality. Everyone is smiling, everyone is dancing, everyone is living in the magic. That's how powerful our minds are. The eyes we choose to see with will reflect the I's we embody. Vice versa as well... The I's that I choose to embody will reflect the eye's I choose to see with.
So, this illusion is not driven by some external force. Rather, it is governed by my internal condition. Every person in my reality is a fractal of a subconscious belief that is reflecting back to me. That means, that every character on the stage is showing me exactly what I need to see about myself. This thinking can seem awfully grandiose, especially living with a mental health diagnosis that has grandiose delusions as a symptom of a manic episode. Not to get too conspiracy theory, but it's almost as if my thought process is set up to be a "problem" in the eyes of certain structures and forms of thought. Certain philosophies and doctrines have set me up for failure in the eyes of societal views. So, this is where we press onward toward self discovery and self empowerment. We consciously choose to detach from the inherent suffering induced by our reflection, become the observer, and change our internal condition to adjust our external reality.
We now become an active player in the game, yet we've discovered the source code and choose to rewrite our program. This is when the shift begins...
I truly believe our reality is much more complex than that. But this is a great starting point to truly innerstand what is going on. Funny that this idea isn't a new thought. This philosophy has been around for a very long time. Us "New Agers" aren't really that new, are we? We're more "Rediscovery Agers". Seeking truth that has been hidden in time, casted out by many, and brought back to the light once again to prevail. And so it is, and always will be...
Today, I was reflecting on resilience and why I don’t give up. It brought me back to a vulnerable space I was in about 2 years ago that I thought was important to share. Without too much detail, I can step into the exact moment that propelled me into my path in life. I had reached another spiral of despair and shame in my life, fueled by misery and the incessant need to stuff whatever I could into my veins to escape my reality. Tired of the morbid self reflection and the despair from not being able to break the deadly cycles, I chose to mix up my “final shot” and end it. After releasing the 1cc that was destined to end my existence, I decided to admit defeat and let the death train spiral in. As my breathing got heavier and the room got darker, I came to peace with the fact that I would never experience the happiness I wanted for so long. As the tension grew in the house, my family knew something was up. Regardless of it being 4am, and they should have been getting rest, mother’s instinct kicked in, and they knew I wan't okay. With my breathing becoming more shallow, I knew it was time to make my peace and to ascend into another realm. Just when my heart was beating faster, and I was slipping away, that’s when the miracle happened. In walked this colorful form I have never seen before. She was about 5’6”, African American and glowing. She walked in, leaned down, and gave me a kiss that I will never forget. She told me, “It’s not your time, you’re destined for more”. Just then, the unexpected happened. My breathing came back, my heart rate slowed down, and I was immediately sober.
After the darkest night of my life, I finally started to see color again. The sun rose, with the birds chirping louder than ever. The Universe had gifted me a second chance. That was the biggest moment of my life that carries me through the darkest times, to this day. Now, I didn’t share all this to get sympathy points or a poor me. This was to show you, the viewer, why I choose to not give up. Regardless of up bringing, social class, gender, or race, we all have moments where we fully understand why we are still here. I ask that you take a step back and reflect on those moments of magic. Embed them in your brain, in your heart, and let them be the beacon of hope to carry you through the darkest of storms. This is where character and strength are developed, in the chaos of our own confusion and misery. A muscle can never reach it’s maximum strength unless it is torn down and built back up. Recognize that our life has seasons. Some are bright and glorious, some are dark and morbid, and some are just “okay”. Regardless of the time, our resilience lies in how we weather these seasons. Are we going to fight the current, or release our resistance and lean into the wind? Only then do we understand the true flexibility of our character.
These tests to our being bring about a vital message that we must hold onto. What is that message to you? This is personalized, never universal. But, there is a common theme I see in these Dark Nights of The Soul that remain apparent in every individual I encounter. It teaches us that no matter what happens, we can make it through. That we are more than the destined, fated cycles of generational and ancestral karma. Our blueprints for existence are out of date, and those of you that landed on this blog are living proof or rewriting you story. I still have my days where I want to throw in the towel and give up. Where I just want to admit defeat and cancel out everything I’ve done in this life time. For me, hope in something greater then myself is what brought about this level of awareness to my destined path. As I grow and expand into the being I am today, this destiny seems to bend and mold with the tide. So, I release expectation of what I wanted my life to be, and resign to the fact that I am EXACTLY where I NEED to be. Even when I’m crossing the street, and that dickhead in a Mercedes almost hits me, I landed at that exact moment in time for some grander purpose. The good, the bad, and the ugly all have meaning in it for me. Now, I consciously choose, at times, not to look at the why or the details, but just accept it for what it is. A lot of this acceptance came from when I recognized my gifts, my talents, my “magic”.
My strength is in my heart. It’s the depth of my love and the depth of my passion. Where I was raised to see this as a weakness, I choose to see as a strength. So, that’s where my mission came about. My destiny was to embed this warm loving heart in everything I do. There are days where it runs empty because I have been freely giving it to others, and that’s okay. It teaches me to give that warmth back to myself and to connect to something bigger. To allow this Universal life force to enter me and to fill me up with the warmth and love of its very own embrace. So, today, when the times I get tough, I hold onto the idea that the spirit that entered my room that night knew my heart and knew my soul. She knew that I needed to embed that more into my life and into the lives of others. With the understanding of polarization, balance, and duality, I recognize there’s a cause and effect in life. That with every down there is an up. As above, so below. For every moment of darkness, there’s a moment of light. I also recognize that this is a fundamental part of learning and growing. It’s the suffering that no longer has to live in this new reality. As long as we realize that these dark days, dark emotions, dark WHATEVER, are nothing but teachers to us, we will be better off. It didn’t come about to break us down, it came about to build us up. Let pain be the motivator to move you closer to unconditional love. Let sadness be the reason for you to constantly seek happiness. Let the darkness be the reason you inch closer and closer to the light. And so it is, and always will be…
When it comes down to the energy that we carry on a day to day basis, I can’t help but discuss the burdens of our past, and how they can effect our present moment. Have you ever met someone for the first time, and you could sense their timid nature? It’s instictive for us as humans to do a basic read on any individual we meet for the first time. It’s a survival technique that helps us to distinguish between friend and foe. This is because we are intuitively reading the individual, their energy, their body language and mannerisms. What I like to refer as “culture karma”, is a state of being where our past defines our present moment. When you have been given such labels as criminal, addict, crazy, homicidal, or suicidal, we tend to carry those labels with us on a day to day basis. When we show up for job interviews or meet strangers on the street, that is the energy we are giving off. “Don’t come close to me, I am (XYZ).” This is where healing our wounds and forgiving our past is an integral part of moving forward.
When we carry these labels with us, it can effect our everyday life. Even years after integrating our lessons and becoming better individuals, carrying this burden can and will bleed out into every facet of our lives. It will effect our daily interactions, including being able to move forward in careers. Until we make peace with the fact that our past doesn’t have to define our present moment, we immediately break through the stigma and open doors to a new way of living. Yes, our past serves an important role in the definition of who we are at this given point of time. But I am speaking on holding onto the weight of negative titles that we carry on our shoulders.
For a very long time, I carried the title of “drug addict” on my shoulders. It was a weight that was extremely difficult to bear. When I met you, I knew you didn’t want to see who I was. You didn’t want to see the monster in my heart. I couldn’t live with that title, so who else could? This is when I had to learn that even though it has shaped me into the man I am becoming, it doesn’t have to be a life sentence. Institutions like to give us such titles to help put a general framework on understanding who and what we are. Some of these titles, however, carry a heavy stigma that can keep us cast into a corner that can be extremely lonely and difficult to get out of. Through healing my childhood wounds and integrating all of those aspects into the now presence, I am slowly learning that those titles don’t fit my current framework.
The important part of the removal of this title and energy is integrating a new title and a new energy. Now, keep it expansive, we don’t want to remove a limited title and replace it with a limited title or energy. Keep it broad and flexible. Something that will bend and mold to the creation of your new being. When you start to wake up, you will see how fast your beliefs can shift as you get closer and closer to your natural imprint. As your frequency rises and adjusts, so do your beliefs. So let’s not restrict ourselves to a category that won’t leave any head room for growth.
Who do you want to be? What do you want to embody? How does this new title feel? Is the jacket a little loose or a little tight? Do you have room to grow in this title, or is it setting you into a cramped framework? The beautiful part of recreating your reality, is that you can paint it however you want. Granted, not everyone will like it. It takes a new kind of bravery to stand on your own two feet and to discount the fear components embedded in a lot of societies DNA. I knew I was tired of living out the same monotonous day-to-day existence. I was tired of waking up, condemned to a life of misery and anguish because I had a fetish for putting needles in my arms. That is why I consciously choose to rewrite my story.
When the word sovereignty comes into play, we can’t help but look at the “Free Will Factor” in accordance with our rights as a spiritual being in the human plane. So many times, we hear that we have the right to free will, especially when we are exiting control conditions that have been placed upon us for millennia. But there are so many factors that determine our limits of free will. For instance, we have demands on many levels that access the senses, and if those demands aren’t met, it will affect the outcome of any situation in our lives. The human body has essential needs that need to be met, and if those needs aren’t met, it will create a ripple effect that can hinder our being on every level. This ties into the trinity of our being: mind, body and spirit.
If I consciously choose to not eat meat, and my basic nutrition isn’t supplied in other forms, it will creep into my physical health, my emotional health, and thus make an impact on my spiritual being. If I consciously choose not to sleep, it will hinder my ability to make cognitive decisions, effect my emotional health, and thus drain into my physical and spiritual being. At a soul level, our root has a nutritional check list that needs to be adhered to. If we don’t give ourselves soul nutrition, it will effect our decisions. At this level, we grow to understand that there is a “conditional” free will of sorts. So many aspects of our spiritual awakening aren’t cut and dry. Yes, once we escape the controls of society, we do have a level of sovereignty that keeps us free. But, at a soul level, we have a calling. If that calling is denied, we will slowly feel it wither away every facet of our temporal experience. This “Shaman Sickness” will eventually keep us in a loop of illness that will manifest in many ways. That’s where our free will gets tested.
When we signed up to be a part of this Soul Journey, we begin to recognize our mission. Since our job here in this ascension process is extremely important, at the micro and macro level, we have to follow this path. Sometimes, to get back onto our path, if we stray far away, we need to go through this realization of what our soul nutrition is. Denial of these aspects, soul nutrition, can lead to dark nights of the soul, physical ailments, spiritual collapse, and huge tower moments that lead us to self doubt, depression, and eventually a demise that ripples out into our loved ones lives. That’s why it’s important to treat ourselves with kindness and to learn what our soul desires. No longer do we have 100% free will. We have sovereignty, and the right to consciously use discernment to navigate the ascension. But, fundamentals are important. That is why the inward journey is so important. We have to quiet the noise, and listen to what our root wants. When we recognize the true power and strength of our soul, our God-Like presence within, we recognize that if catered too in a healthy way, we have the power to become whatever we want. But, we can’t neglect the fundamentals that make us who we are. What are you doing today to listen to the voice of creation within? What does your inner child want? What is your future self excited for you to start? Where does that hungry soul feel these depletion? Important questions we must ask ourselves, and find a way to give ourselves that nutrition. Denial of any aspect or repressing it’s voice will lead to a powerful backlash that will manifest in unfortunate situations that leave us perplexed.
This is where integration is key in the healing journey. Since separation is no longer a factor, unifying our emotional, spiritual and physical being is the key to soul retrieval. When we call for unification in our external reality, we are also calling that within. So, for today, how are you unifying your spirit? Is your physical body manifesting a nutrient deficiency at a soul level? Is your spirit feeling lonely from a physical need not being met? I invite you to create a dialogue with your being, and find a healthy way to give yourself what you need. Then, and only then, can we see free will be created into our reality. Every action has an equal or opposite reaction. So, for today, I consciously choose to make appropriate actions toward feeding my being with the most healthy, loving light that will help me create the best possible outcome in my reality. I choose to listen, and to spend some time with learning my root. I choose to give myself what I need, to accept it without judgement, and to watch my reflection shift to work in my favor. And so it is, and always will be.